holes in pigeons

Backpacharacters

Backpacharacters is a side-pocket size guide to five types of travellers and the indisputable traits that make them part of the tourist species we affectionately know as the ‘Backpacker’.

For those familiar with tramping the land carrying half your body weight, sleeping with cockroaches and eating oats for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you’re certain to have shared a six dorm bunk with a Backpacharacter. They are individuals belonging to a distinct flock of travellers who eat, dress, speak and photo-take as one. Here is an introduction to these types so you may become familiar with arguably the most interesting tourist attraction on offer
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The Boardshort Bachelor

Sex: Bloke
Age: classic 18-35 bracket with the bulk of them in their 20’s
Stays: at the acclaimed party hostels. They book accommodation offering all the essentials: beer parties, beer bongs, beer Olympics, foam parties and pool side bars. They spend days at a time nursing hangovers til three pm after nights of debauchery and drink special indulgence.
Dress: a bare tanned chest and knee-length, offensively colourful, surf branded boardies worn just above the bum crack so that white strip of tan line shows. Shaved head or scruffy unwashed knots. Thongs. Dark sunglasses. A beaded surfy style necklace.
Likes: Wet T-shirt Babes, toga parties, porn, Utes, jaga bombs, fights, meat, tools, swear words, sport.
Drink: beer or beam.
Quote: ‘F***en c***ts…’
Photographs: their mates’ bare white arses, their own shit in the toilet, their mates throwing up, them and their mates holding pints of beer and wearing Hawaiian leis.
Tattoo: a massive tribal style tat on the shoulder and/or the Southern Cross on the calf.
Places of interest: the beach, the bar or wherever Contiki bus drops them off.